Previously, we talked about how mysterious and unpredictable life can become, that everything has a beginning and an end, and that some events have the power to change us. But we did not talk about the tools that can work as a guide in the moments of greatest sadness and loneliness.
I think we can all agree that whenever something bad happens to us, regardless of beliefs or religions, we turn to a higher force and ask for strength and patience to deal with uncertainty. Since we do not have all the answers nor the ability to understand why certain things happen, we, as human beings, feel the need to connect with something greater than ourselves, with some entity or entities that give us hope and serenity through dark times.
Personally, I can say that 2015 was a tough year because I suffered the loss of my dog, who was incredibly special to me. She was part of my family, and one day, all of a sudden, left this world without any reason or explanation. Those days were especially difficult for me, I was truly devastated, I felt alone… until, out of nowhere, God made His appearance through my dear sister. The irony is that, as far as I knew, she was not too religious or spiritual; yet she framed a beautiful prayer and sent it to me as a present; it was a turning point in my life.
Now, I would like to share and discuss with you this prayer, that no doubt has become my favorite. It has accompanied, comforted and helped me through the most difficult moments of my life. It has been a breath of fresh air every time I needed an answer, and it has made me more resilient in situations of pain. It goes like this:
God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
courage to change the things I can,
and wisdom to know the difference.
But what do these sentences mean? Let us read them carefully:
God, grant me the SERENITY to accept the things I cannot change…
How many times have we been angry for not achieving a goal or for not being able to change a situation? How many times have we suffered irreparable losses that were difficult to accept? In those moments, life shows us that we do not have control over things, that some situations just exceed us and transcend us as human beings, and there is no coherent explanation. And it makes sense, because if we knew everything, then we would have little left to learn, experiment and live. Therefore, through these words, God invites us to be humble about life and to develop our ability to act calmly and patiently in the face of pain. Imagine if every person in the world facing adversities reacted impulsively and passionately. It would be a big chaos, there would be no limits nor self-control, it would be the survival of the fittest; there would be no room for personal introspection and growth.
COURAGE to change the things I can…
God tells us that sometimes change is possible. But what does that refer to? The capability to change others or ourselves? There is one thing life has taught me and it is that if we are privileged enough, there are certain things we can definitely choose. For example: whom to surround yourself with; whom to trust and listen to; and what to consume (including food, books, tv shows, news, newspapers, etc.) The choice depends on what we want for our lives, and we have to be courageous and responsible enough to make decisions and assume their consequences.
And WISDOM to know the difference…
This last sentence is perhaps the most difficult to acknowledge. Sometimes our egos deceive us and make us believe we can do or change everything, but we have to work on our wisdom and humility to distinguish what is humanly achievable and which decisions are going to lift our spirits. Wisdom is not something a person can achieve overnight, it is built from the lessons that life’s events teach us. It is no secret that within tribes the elders are the wisest people, and they give counseling and guidance to everyone in their community; that is why it is so important to connect with our intuition and inner power, we have to give spirituality its place and forget our egos. We must understand that there are things we will never be able to grasp, but it is fine because God will always embrace us and give us shelter and guidance.
In short, even though we cannot see the whole picture nor understand it in its totality, everything happens for a reason and each event has its own purpose. In my case, this prayer helps me find peace and makes me understand that not everything is up to me, that life is a cycle, and it is made up of good and bad moments. So, I hope you can incorporate it to your life, and find comfort in it like I do. Finally, do not hesitate to get in touch with me if you are going through a difficult time or just need someone to talk to, always remember we are not alone.
Jeannette is available for keynote addresses, breakout sessions, and panel discussions. Contact her for availability.